Nescafe Blend 43
I’ve spent a lot of time wondering if this Ironman journey is actually for me? Is this what I really want? Is this goal I’ve set too much? Too big? Too far away? Too hard?
I suppose the person who I trust the most with all of my secrets and dilema’s is my mate Rob, he lives in Tassie and we’ve been emailing each other for a couple of years now. Back and forth, almost every day and our relationship is probably the best friendship I’ve got. He’ll tell me to my face what he thinks and I’ll get all sooky and not talk to him for a day until boredem sets in.
Anyway, about whether this is for me or not.
My mate Rob said, “do you enjoy your training?”
I said, “not really.”
Rob said, “so why don’t you just ride your bike for fun for a while?”
I thought about it, riding my bike for fun? I emailed Rob back, “I can’t JUST ride my bike for fun anymore, I need to achieve things, I need goals and I need to have a reason to get up in the morning.”
Last week my head clicked into gear and I found some focus that I now realise was missing, last week I didn’t miss a single training session, my body is tired and I want to sleep and not even the little ring is being kind to me right now.
My thighs hurt, the niggles in my right leg are noticeable, when I face plant my pillow of an evening I literally pass out. 5am starts between Monday to Friday with a 25km commute each way (50km a day on a bike), 3 swims a week, 5 runs and ride my arse of on the weekends.
I hate that my shoulder hurts at the 3km mark when I’m running and that it takes another 3km for me to shake that feeling, that when I get home from my runs I have to burst the blisters on my toes. It’s not like I’m going that far, 16km was my longest run ever on Sunday and I managed the last 3km with a walk run strategy. That 16km’s was all hills, I went home, changed my kit and went out on the bike for a gentle spin… Up some hills.
Believe it or not, I’ve loved every kilometre, the 360km on the bike, 46km of running and the 7km in the pool. My eating has gotten better because of my body, my body wants good food, it doesn’t actually want chocolate, it wants success.
I want to be successful. 413km in one week and it wouldn’t have been possible without my brothers girlfriend Alicia, she’s cooked dinner almost every night last week.
Its less than 20 days to Yeppoon and I’m starting to feel anxious, I’m a little bit on edge. I don’t go out, I decline social invitations and I always ask the person I’m about to meet up with if they’re sick or not. I want to tell you about Perth, don’t get me wrong, but the locals have asked me to keep it a secret and tell you that even though it looks nice, the waters are all shark infested, they drive fast here and there’s more Toorak Tractors and Utes than there are in Toorak. This place is a little bit weird, but to be wearing shorts and t-shirts in the middle of July… I’m in heaven.
The main picture on this post is just for your imagination, to keep you going through that Southern East Coast winter, it really doesn’t (DOES) look that nice here. I thought I’d miss Melbourne but I don’t, I miss my friends, Dining Nirvana, Mr and Mrs Brammer, CBS, Claire, Carrie Lim, the Saturday morning Giant Rides, asking Jo Hall for a trinity every time I see her (if you don’t ask you don’t get…), Stef Hanson being all awesome whenever I randomly saw her, Paul, Marg (best boss ever), Von, Lysianne, Lou and obviously my mum.
It’s true, I’ve drunk Nescafe blend 43 since arriving over here and I’m okay with it. Friend Dining Nirvana is shocked and appalled, but when your 400km away from the latest ‘it’ cafe, you make do. And don’t think I’ve got nothing here, I’m employed, I’ve got Chad, Caroline, OzSmurf, friend JoJo, my brother, Alicia, I’ve got a whole family of people who I can selfishly call my own if I desire.
I’m looking forward to Yeppoon, it’s starting to feel real.